A new path

okay...i'm done drinking. although i totally love it, it does not love me. it causes me depression, weight gain and the possibility of getting a DUI. i just cannot continue down this path becuase i will either be a.) super obese b.) unemployed or c.) dead in a few years from an organ shut down.

and i just don't drink; i get wasted. i get 'time to carry tanya to her bed' drunk most every time. so pathetic and so unattractive. it was cute at 23 so not cute at 44.

this won't be easy but i'm making my blog accountable for me. I want to go out and party with everyone at any time and just not drink. THAT will be the hardest...alcohol to me means relief. freedom. numbness. comfortably numbness. but it affects EVERY area of my life. i'm just not a good drinker. i can never be casual or even once in a while drunk. anyway...that's my new thought. i wish i could bribe God to let me win the lottery and i'll stay sober for that; but, He hasn't fallen for that. He must be busy trying to save all the ocean life from the spill or the people from war-torn countries...He's like that you know....

okay...off for my last 7 beers : )