Wednesday, August 10, 2005

The Poopie List

Since everyone loves poopie and the word poopie, May i present to you "The Poopie List":

GHOST POOPIE: The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.

CLEAN POOPIE: The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper. This is the poopie we all strive for. The Perfect Poopie.

WET POOPIE: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't ruin them with stains.

SECOND WAVE POOPIE: This happens when you're done pooping and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize that you have to poopie some more.

POP-A VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD POOPIE: The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.

LINCOLN LOG POOPIE: The kind of poopie that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.

GASSY POOPIE: It's so noisy, that everyone within earshot is giggling.

DRINKER'S POOPIE: The kind of poopie you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.

CORN POOPIE: Self explanatory.

GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-POOPIE POOPIE: The kind where you want to poopie but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.

SPINAL TAP POOPIE: That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways.

WET CHEEKS POOPIE (The Power Dump): The kind that comes out so fast, your butt cheeks get splashed with water.

THE DANGLING POOPIE: This poopie refuses to drop in the toilet even though you are done poopie-ing it. You just hope that a shake or two will cut it loose.

THE SURPRISE POOPIE: You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you are about to fart, but *oops* --- a poopie!


Blogger ads510 said...

the poop coincidence is amazing...everyone posting about poo! maybe everyone's having a shitty week. hardy har har...

10:03 AM  
Blogger GlitterGlamGirl05 said...

OMG, I laughed so hard reading that...You forgot the turtle head poope, the kind where you know something needs to come out but it just won't.


10:22 AM  
Blogger Tanya Kristine said...

i know...this is just my favorite list. i found it like 18 years ago when i was temping at a job. i laughed so hard, i had tears coming out of my eyes. they thought i was so weird.

i never went back...

11:18 AM  
Blogger Tanya Kristine said...

an ha ha

11:18 AM  
Blogger ads510 said...

Another one that i hate is the rabbit turd poopie--you push and push and feel like you're going to explode, and then all you get is little tiny rabbit turds.

11:18 AM  
Blogger Bahee said...

HAHA, you're posting about poo too!!! Well, I hope you read my poo post. Also, TAG YOU'RE IT! You now must list 10 turn-on's and 10 turn-off's...ready, set, go!

12:14 PM  
Blogger Tanya Kristine said...

i read your blog frickin hilarious.

i'll do my tag tomorrow...

1:04 PM  
Blogger PapaPeters said...

please i'm not playing blackout forever

2:16 PM  
Blogger tabitha jane said...

tanya you are so cute! only you could talk about poopies and make it as cute as it is!

my husband calls "turtle heads" "prarie doggin' it"

4:14 PM  
Blogger captain_howdy_girl said...

great post TK, loved it.
lots of poop talk these days on blogger :)

12:19 AM  
Blogger ads510 said...

TK-you were right about me not giving poop enough credit. I changed it to a turn on!

6:51 AM  
Blogger Tanya Kristine said...

'ats my girl!

dirty speculum. GROSS! here in the US though they use disposable ones. *phew*

9:57 AM  
Blogger Ghost Dog said...

Poopies are funny.

1:41 PM  
Blogger Tanya Kristine said...

i remember after reading this list, i would classify all my poopies...i funny.

4:17 PM  
Blogger Potted-flower said...

spoken like a true poopie

4:02 AM  
Blogger Kathy said...

You brought me to tears when I read this. Hilarious.

7:25 AM  
Blogger Lightning Bug's Butt said...

I was trying to ignore this one, Tanya! :)

12:53 PM  
Blogger Tanya Kristine said... no likey poopie?

2:23 PM  
Blogger countrygirl said...

love it alot. nothing wrong with a little poop talk.

4:51 PM  

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