Day 6!!! Almost there!!

I'm so excited that i'm almost done. i feel like i'm completing a 30 day fast! i can only imagine how enlightened one would be after a 30 day fast. but i ain't gonna find out anytime soon THIS year! 7 days was enough. although oddly enough, if i could drink V-8 the entire time i might be able to do it. those fresh veggie juices, in my opinion, are just nasty. yesterday, i had a carrot, cabbage, celery drink and had to PLUG MY NOSE!! to get through it! that's not good...

Speaking of yesterday, i went to see my girlfriends 10 year old daughter in a 3 hour play (ahem) and she was, by far, the best. of course, i'm emotional right now so i cry. like she's MY daughter. But she really was fun to watch. or maybe i was crying becuase we had 2.55 more hours to go...i did have my massage to look forward to.

that's right. i booked a massage and after i was done, i was butta. Sweet, creamy, salty, lovely butta...aaaah...oh!

When i got there, however, they took me back to the shower area and the Russian lady was telling me "Ooooh you have the best massage therapist here! you are really going to enjoy this!"

"Wow...that's aweome!" and i'm thinking to myself 'good! i need the best becuase i'm on a fast and i deserve the best. THIS IS HARD!'

"Here's your locker, your robe and towel...go ahead and get ready and he'll be with you shortly..."

I felt like ren & stimpy looking at her, blinking rapidly, not moving a muscle.

"Did you say 'he'?"

"Jes"

um...sorry no. there's something about being in a small, warmly scented dark room with a strange, handsome, most-likely foreign man rubbing my oiled naked body that makes me feel slightly uncomfortable. I know it seems weirder that i'd prefer a woman; but, go ahead - rub my ass. i can guarantee you "it" won't move.

So I gots me my woman! From Russia no less. She's rubbing my back when she goes "hmm...vhat's zis?" (is that german?)

"what?"

"hmm...zere iz a lettle lump here"

Instantly, i sweat. a lump? on my lower back? is that what my pain is from? cancer?? Now, she's russian and speaks very limited English but i'm sure what she meant to say was 'oh i've seen this a million times, it's never anything; but just to be sure get it checked out. it's tiny and seems to be a small bone spur - no worries!' but instead she finds her limited english words of "Not good...not gooood..."

NOt good indeed. not a good way to start my massage either...but since i'm clearer with my fast, i tried really hard to put it out of my mind and enjoy the moment. because if i'm giong to die in excruciating pain from bone cancer, at least right NOW i feel great!

so it went on with little incident after that...and then i sat in the steam room for 10 minutes and that, too, was heaven.

i slept like a log and dreamt i ate a shit load of food. and then felt guilty and tried to realize this was just a dream and simply back track and go to when you didnt' eat. which i did. i love control in my dreams too.

what i need to stop doing is reading cookbooks before i drift off....not smaht.

So tomorrow might be hell becuase it's my last day on the fast and it'll be spent at work. yuck...but maybe the excitement of being able to eat solid foods on tuesday will be enough to carry me through...

thanks for all the supporting comments. really i think i stayed on this so i wouldn't be embarrassed to report to you, i couldn't do it. Not a bad bonus as one result of joining the blogging world...