Coffeeee....

I can't drink my own coffee anymore. But i loves me some starbucks early in the a.m. and i love driving there because the red lights last 3 seconds.

So. i've fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinally figured out what to do in life. Don't know why it popped in my head with such a fever that i've been to 2 appts already and have spent a few hours plotting out my new schedule; but, it has.

I'm going to school to be a vet tech.

Vet. Tech. Hmm....I think i'm going to say i'm going to shcool to be a veterinarian becuase vet tech sounds lame. Like "I'm going to be a barista!!" Not that there's anything wrong with being a barista but they both make the same amount of money and one requires two years of grueling school. But I digress; my first class is chemistry and i'm STOKED about that! well, stoked and scared...although i'm still smart i'm not HALF the smart woman i used to be. I'm hoping 'thinking' will actually help me rebuild my brain. but if not, i can always cheat and you know i will.

I won't start the actual program til january of next year but i have to complete a chemistry and biology course first. and one other little fucking pesky thing i have to get before i can even be considered for the program but whatever. and as Robin pointed out, I ain't just gotta be a vet tech, i can volunteer all over the world!!!! I've got something worth sharing!!

The only weird thing that came out fo this was Kevin's encouraging words that in less than 5 years I'll be 50 (FIFTY!!!) and can actually retire from the state. i'll make the least amount i can make but who ficking cares??? I'll be OUT OF THE STATE! Unless i can work for Food & Ag assisting and directing with the cows and shit. i'll save one bovine a month. (i used the vet tech term; did you catch that?)

Going to napa today...i have a state car and i have to pick up a student every morning...she's as sweet as pie but I really love to make that trip alone. ah well....at least i'm OUT of the office...

p.s. i'm going to have an AS degree. a DEGREE! ME!!!

Love Jake..

..but i'm glad his mom is coming to get him tonight. he wakes up EVERY morning whining. i hate whining. and every single breath out is a whine. i could throttle him.

I stopped HCG cuz i can't do it anymore. if i could have peanut butter apples every night for dinner i could probably do it; but, i can't. and i hate the food. it's bland and boring and i'd just rather not eat. i'm in the 150's and there i'll stay til i get in to the 140's. and there i'll stay period. i bought new socks which means i have to run in them or it'll be a waste of money. my new "diet" is to not eat like a pig or drink like dean martin.

i'm going to napa today and for teh rest of the week. that's an awesome break from the office. i have to go with a co-worker today and he's a perv, but i am flattered that a young buck is hot for me. course he'd probably be hot for roseanne barr but i try not to think like that. i'll assume it's me.

I got my hair done friday and i don't know what's so magical about my hair that it just cannot be done but it is pretty amazing. last time i had pencil strips; this time i had the crown highlighted and yet my entire crown is still gray! I don't even know how that's possible!! The lady that did my hair was in her late 50's and tha'ts the problem. s he's not young and up on the current trends. she even cut my hair lame. good thing i like ponytails...

i hate myself right now

I don't even want to LOOK at me! i was doing so good and i fucked it up by eating PEANUT BUTTER! I need a PBA meeting.