Are you my mother?: January 2008

The "January of 2008 Curse" lives on...

Well, let's friggin' hope it's just a January curse and not a 2008 one.

Saturday Janet and I went to Thunder Valley to gamble all our hard-earned money. We were winning big; i was up about $250 (money janet gave me..heh..heh...?). When i lost all my money, it was time to go.

I wanted to sleep on the ride home becuase i just wanted to be home. It's never a deep sleep; you can hear the car cruising down the road, the blinker when it's turned on, the sound of the rain underneath the tires, the sound of a drunk driver slamming in to your rear.

WHAM!

I opened my eyes and Janet calmly & panicly says "we've just been hit!" "where's the car?" "oh my god, i need to call 911." "did you see the people crossing the road?"

I am still coming to when i hear her barrage of internal thoughts being spoken externally. I turned around and did, indeed, see people running across the street. I got out and ran over to them, they barely spoke english. Me thinks it's the guy who hit us buddies and they quickly drive off. I'm assuming they've been drinking as well.

I am looking for the guy who hit us fearing he just took off when i saw his car down the embankment upside down. I freaked out and ran down the hill. There are people gathering on the other side of the fence trying to call 911. i hear the guy moving and tell him it's okay that nothing is on fire or ready to explode...he crawls out, covered in blood. but is fine. of course he's fine; he's drunk. when you get in a wreck you either want to be drunk or asleep. i was one; he was the other. But he's in major deep shit.

the cops & fire trucks show up and put us in the back of the cruiser becuase it's pouring out. I don't like being in the back of the cruiser. it's usually never a good thing.

anyway, long story, medium, they hauled that guy off, the officer took us home (after he asked us if there was anyone we could call to come pick us up. at 3am!) and we're all good.

One thing that is weird about car accidents, you can relive it in your head and hear the exact sound of the crash. Like you're there again.

Oh HEY!

things are looking up! I just heated up some delicious couscous, let Kody lick the bowl and then 10 minutes later heated up some more. IN THE SAME BOWL!

ick ick ick...i was only reminded of waht i did when i let him re-lick that bowl.

god. can you catch anything from dried dog saliva?

Still runnin...

I think today makes my 8th practice. It was cold, rainy and slightly windy and by the time I finished my run, i felt like i had just completed the marathon.

I'm in for a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooong train.

BUT, even though my mom's dying, my boyfriend dumped me, my foster dog is going blind, i hate my job and didn't get the one I interviewed for; i'm still runnin....

2008

what a crappy fucking year.

Talent

Ever see the movie Once? It's a gorgeous, non-assuming musical set in Dublin, Ireland. You'll have to subtitle it as the dialogue is a bit stronger than we're used to.

Anyway.

Kevin gave me the CD WAY before I saw'r the movie and when he gave me the CD i did my typical eye roll. Because Kevin LOVES musicals and I personally don't. but i tried the CD and instantly fell in love with it...

when the movie came out I was stoked. When i saw'r it, it was nothing what i expected. It was so lovely, so sweet, so smooth.

At my home, i have at my disposal, a piano. I used to love to think i was gifted but i am not. And now i have my brothers guitar and again i try to prove i'm a savant but alas i'm normal. below average actually and it's so frustrating because music can vibrate my soul. It makes me feel things I love to feel but can't seem to find in everyday life.

So I tried to play some of the songs on my ipod from once and i suck. i suck so bad i'm pissed...but put me in front of a microphone...well...stand back...becuase I'm Tanya, bitch.

Well, I'm back.

Thank you to all who kindly sent me well-wishes...it was much appreciated. and needed.

It took me 17 hours to get to Bellingham. All was fine until I reached the Siskiyou Summit. Chains were required and due to a miscommunication with the checkpoint cop, I took off withOUT getting a chain monkey to chain my wheels. By the time I got to the top of the summit, I pulled over. I tried to be a man and put my chains on but I was just a girl. And I couldn't do it. So I did what some girls do and sat in my car and cried. And a man who does what some men do, pulled over and put them on for me. I hugged him and tried to give him $20 (this is after i texted Kevin his license plate number in case he killed me) but he'd have nothing of it...thanks man I don't know!!

Finally, I arrived in B'ham, grabbed my suitcase and my damn brother didn't even have one beer for me. So i had some milk and went to bed. I felt really bad for my old boy Kody having to sit in that car for 17 long hours but he did not whine once. It's like he knew something was different about this trip. On the first night, he attacked moms pug once, tried to eat her parrot a few times but did settle in and accept his new surroundings. I took him running one day and a long-ass walk the next and then I quit and just shopped, partied and slept.

My mom is in a care facility and it smells like poop & death. I hated going in there. Of course she was in the last room of the building and each room I passed had either an empty bed or one soon to be empty. I told kevin that i hope i NEVER get that way; but, he assured me we'd take care of each other. He knows DAMN well, he'll be the one taking care of me. and my luck, that's when he'll leave me. in my own feces-filled diapers.

She seemed to be in really good spirits though. Her legs are so edema'd up that they are literally leaking. but she doesn't like to lay down because the liquid fills her upper body (i guess) and she can't breathe. What a drag. But one thing she reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally really loved, was that damn dog. She was tickled pink to see Kody. and i brought him in 3 days in a row for 2 hours at a time. He not only made her day, but everyone elses...and can't you just see why?

my little beast will get on ANYONE'S bed...even grandmas....

Life

My moms dying.

I'm driving to Bellingham tomorrow to see her and i'm excited about that. Today is her 80th birthday. I called to tell her Happy Birthday but my brother said she's not hearing very well so he yelled to her that I said 'Happy Birthday' and she gave him the finger for me.

Looks like she's having a good day.

When they told her I was coming up she didn't really react. Then she turned beet red and they, my brother and staff, were worried that she might be having a heart attack. When my brother was telling me the story I was thinking 'how sweet...she's excited that i'm coming'; but, instead he told me that she said "She's not bringing that God damn dog, is she?"

Yup...looks like she's having a good day....and, yes Mom...I am bringing that God damn dog.

An actual food post!

I had dinner last Sunday and had kevin and janet over. The dinner was Coconut Rice from VWAV, a medley of squash and Horseradish-Coriander crusted tofu.

it was delish.

I wanted to visit when everyone arrived so i prepared everything in advance. All i had to do was turn on the heat.

I started with the coconut rice which was made with coconut milk, lime zest and a cinnamon stick.

when the rice is done, you top it with toasted coconut...yum!

Then i prepared the crust which is also from VWAV and is made with Panko bread crumbs, crushed mint & garlic, ground coriander & horseradish. It called for freshly grated horseradish but I used my bloody mary horseradish and i think that's a no no.

Here are the tofu squares. I coulnd't get the coating to stick, so i just laid the tofu in the pan and topped it instead. still tasted intereting - in a good way.