Happy T'day!

Our original plan was to catch a lunch train and take a 3 hour tour; BUT, our lame luck determined we would miss the fucking train.

here we are BEFORE we realized we were blockheads (hahaha)


(god i look fat but i'm NOT i swear!)

(okay..maybe i am)

(i'm fat like a ham...becuase i AM a ham)

We went back to my local pub and drank and played games. And totally hammed it up for the camera all day. Debby and I have vanity in common.

we played darts:

Pool:

Shuffle Board:

America's Top Model shuffleboard:

We posed:

We played smoldering temptress

My typical 'have to catch my friends peeing' pix. i have about 87 of them.

It was a totally unexpected, laid back, super flowy easy day. we had no idea what we wanted to do but ended up doing things we didn't KNOW we wanted to do. We made it til 7pm too by the way....

SO...some might SAY we missed the train; but, i gotta a feeling the train missed us....

THE END

I'm on to you Red Hawk...

Red Hawk is a casino that opened in December of 07 about 30 minutes from my house to which I had a torrid love affair with for about 6 months. I'm a bad lover...burn me once, shame on you. Burn me twice, shame on you.....burn me 23 times...well I learn eventually.

Last week they sent me a flyer with a $75 FREE SLOT PLAY coupon! $75?? Hell yeah! when i opened it up it was $15 a day for 5 days in a row. Come on! You wanna entice me up there you gotta give me at least $75 per day! Your odds are so friggin bad you could give me $500 and I would still come out a loser.

So I laugh and shake my head today at the new $20 per day coupons I just received. Now Harvey's in Tahoe? They gave me $150. Even an hour and a half drive, I'm going up on the 11th. At least I get scenery...

No one wanted to go out on a Tuesday night (well, HEY...it's like a Thursday because tomorrow is "friday" and then we have like tons of time off!) so I came home and made my OWN happy hour. Lemon Drops ala TK's Bar...


i only had enough vodka for 1.5 of these so it's a sad happy hour....

first spca day

i was there for about 2.5 hours. and it was EXHAUSTING!

i'm such a wimp.

i walked 3 dogs. and this was AFTER i worked out this morning...two of the dogs were pits and the 2nd dog was very sweet, very thin with big nips meaning she had puppies at one time. probably was bred for them. fuckers. the last dog and the 2nd pit was an 8 month old puppy. although i was laughing at her i was very frustrated becuase she was SUCH a puppy. she jumped on me, nipped my jacket sleeves, bit at my feet, tried to trip me (she did try) and pulled like a mack truck. 3 times she pulled my arm out of my socket and i think she fractured my thumb. i'm not a good animal rescuer becuase i wanted to beat her silly. but she got out, she ran in the frisbee yard and she seemed happy to come back to her kennel where her breaksfast awaited her.

i took out 2 dachsund/terrier mixes and they were just darling. and a welcomed breather since i only had to hold both leashes with one finger.

after a few hours i was worn out but on my WAY out i saw a room full of clean, unfolded blankets & towels so i spent 30 minutes folding evreything.

it felt really good today doing somethign outside myself. i probably won't make a habit of it since i'm only used to myself but i hope i do.

i'm making roasted tomatoes and broccoli rabe for lunch. that's my reward. : )

Caring for your Introvert

My ex sent me this article from The Atlantic and I am very thankful he did...this article has now articulated who I am (except the not liking to talk about yourself...i could go on and on and on about me and nobody else but me...hence the blog). it made me laugh in quite a few places. i love all the intellectual references. i like to think i'm a genius in some way. don't confuse that with Savant.

Caring for your Introvert

Do you know someone who needs hours alone every day? Who loves quiet conversations about feelings or ideas, and can give a dynamite presentation to a big audience, but seems awkward in groups and maladroit at small talk? Who has to be dragged to parties and then needs the rest of the day to recuperate? Who growls or scowls or grunts or winces when accosted with pleasantries by people who are just trying to be nice?

If so, do you tell this person he is "too serious," or ask if he is okay? Regard him as aloof, arrogant, rude? Redouble your efforts to draw him out?

If you answered yes to these questions, chances are that you have an introvert on your hands—and that you aren't caring for him properly. Science has learned a good deal in recent years about the habits and requirements of introverts. It has even learned, by means of brain scans, that introverts process information differently from other people (I am not making this up). If you are behind the curve on this important matter, be reassured that you are not alone. Introverts may be common, but they are also among the most misunderstood and aggrieved groups in America, possibly the world.

I know. My name is Jonathan, and I am an introvert.

Oh, for years I denied it. After all, I have good social skills. I am not morose or misanthropic. Usually. I am far from shy. I love long conversations that explore intimate thoughts or passionate interests. But at last I have self-identified and come out to my friends and colleagues. In doing so, I have found myself liberated from any number of damaging misconceptions and stereotypes. Now I am here to tell you what you need to know in order to respond sensitively and supportively to your own introverted family members, friends, and colleagues. Remember, someone you know, respect, and interact with every day is an introvert, and you are probably driving this person nuts. It pays to learn the warning signs.

What is introversion? In its modern sense, the concept goes back to the 1920s and the psychologist Carl Jung. Today it is a mainstay of personality tests, including the widely used Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. Introverts are not necessarily shy. Shy people are anxious or frightened or self-excoriating in social settings; introverts generally are not. Introverts are also not misanthropic, though some of us do go along with Sartre as far as to say "Hell is other people at breakfast." Rather, introverts are people who find other people tiring.

Extroverts are energized by people, and wilt or fade when alone. They often seem bored by themselves, in both senses of the expression. Leave an extrovert alone for two minutes and he will reach for his cell phone. In contrast, after an hour or two of being socially "on," we introverts need to turn off and recharge. My own formula is roughly two hours alone for every hour of socializing. This isn't antisocial. It isn't a sign of depression. It does not call for medication. For introverts, to be alone with our thoughts is as restorative as sleeping, as nourishing as eating. Our motto: "I'm okay, you're okay—in small doses."

How many people are introverts? I performed exhaustive research on this question, in the form of a quick Google search. The answer: About 25 percent. Or: Just under half. Or—my favorite—"a minority in the regular population but a majority in the gifted population."

Are introverts misunderstood? Wildly. That, it appears, is our lot in life. "It is very difficult for an extrovert to understand an introvert," write the education experts Jill D. Burruss and Lisa Kaenzig. (They are also the source of the quotation in the previous paragraph.) Extroverts are easy for introverts to understand, because extroverts spend so much of their time working out who they are in voluble, and frequently inescapable, interaction with other people. They are as inscrutable as puppy dogs. But the street does not run both ways. Extroverts have little or no grasp of introversion. They assume that company, especially their own, is always welcome. They cannot imagine why someone would need to be alone; indeed, they often take umbrage at the suggestion. As often as I have tried to explain the matter to extroverts, I have never sensed that any of them really understood. They listen for a moment and then go back to barking and yipping.

Are introverts oppressed? I would have to say so. For one thing, extroverts are overrepresented in politics, a profession in which only the garrulous are really comfortable. Look at George W. Bush. Look at Bill Clinton. They seem to come fully to life only around other people. To think of the few introverts who did rise to the top in politics—Calvin Coolidge, Richard Nixon—is merely to drive home the point. With the possible exception of Ronald Reagan, whose fabled aloofness and privateness were probably signs of a deep introverted streak (many actors, I've read, are introverts, and many introverts, when socializing, feel like actors), introverts are not considered "naturals" in politics.

Extroverts therefore dominate public life. This is a pity. If we introverts ran the world, it would no doubt be a calmer, saner, more peaceful sort of place. As Coolidge is supposed to have said, "Don't you know that four fifths of all our troubles in this life would disappear if we would just sit down and keep still?" (He is also supposed to have said, "If you don't say anything, you won't be called on to repeat it." The only thing a true introvert dislikes more than talking about himself is repeating himself.)

With their endless appetite for talk and attention, extroverts also dominate social life, so they tend to set expectations. In our extrovertist society, being outgoing is considered normal and therefore desirable, a mark of happiness, confidence, leadership. Extroverts are seen as bighearted, vibrant, warm, empathic. "People person" is a compliment. Introverts are described with words like "guarded," "loner," "reserved," "taciturn," "self-contained," "private"—narrow, ungenerous words, words that suggest emotional parsimony and smallness of personality. Female introverts, I suspect, must suffer especially. In certain circles, particularly in the Midwest, a man can still sometimes get away with being what they used to call a strong and silent type; introverted women, lacking that alternative, are even more likely than men to be perceived as timid, withdrawn, haughty.

Are introverts arrogant? Hardly. I suppose this common misconception has to do with our being more intelligent, more reflective, more independent, more level-headed, more refined, and more sensitive than extroverts. Also, it is probably due to our lack of small talk, a lack that extroverts often mistake for disdain. We tend to think before talking, whereas extroverts tend to think by talking, which is why their meetings never last less than six hours. "Introverts," writes a perceptive fellow named Thomas P. Crouser, in an online review of a recent book called Why Should Extroverts Make All the Money? (I'm not making that up, either), "are driven to distraction by the semi-internal dialogue extroverts tend to conduct. Introverts don't outwardly complain, instead roll their eyes and silently curse the darkness." Just so.

The worst of it is that extroverts have no idea of the torment they put us through. Sometimes, as we gasp for air amid the fog of their 98-percent-content-free talk, we wonder if extroverts even bother to listen to themselves. Still, we endure stoically, because the etiquette books—written, no doubt, by extroverts—regard declining to banter as rude and gaps in conversation as awkward. We can only dream that someday, when our condition is more widely understood, when perhaps an Introverts' Rights movement has blossomed and borne fruit, it will not be impolite to say "I'm an introvert. You are a wonderful person and I like you. But now please shush."

How can I let the introvert in my life know that I support him and respect his choice? First, recognize that it's not a choice. It's not a lifestyle. It's an orientation.
Second, when you see an introvert lost in thought, don't say "What's the matter?" or "Are you all right?"

Third, don't say anything else, either.

Jonathan Rauch is a correspondent for The Atlantic and a senior writer for National Journal.

: (

I was packing my bike for this mornings commute when I heard one of my squirrels chatting furiously. Then I heard another high-pitched tiny scream when I decided it’s probably best to open my garage door.

I walked out to my front lawn when I saw that shit cat sitting on my side walk just staring at me. I yelled at it to scat and walked over to where she had been sitting.

And there was one of my baby squirrels lying on his back, breathing hard & heavy. I looked at him and didn’t see any blood or anything so I ran back in to get a box to put him in. When I came back out he was still lying there and I asked him if he was okay…two seconds later he flipped over and bolted to the tree, all the way up and jumped in my Italian cypress.

I think he’s okay; but, my entire morning ride in all I could hear was his little tiny screams. Fucking cats. I know they gotta do what they do but they AIN’T gonna do it on my property.

Second Saturday

We have an event here in our city where the 2nd saturday of every month, downtown becomes an art walk. Of course, we never go to see the art, we go to find a bar, sit down & party it up.


It's not as crowded in the winter months becuase it's so cold but it was a BEAUTIFUL night Saturday. And made funner by the fact that all my homies was there, including my brother homey.

Dena and her gorgeous daughter Shayna...she likes to call us the Golden Girls. I reminded her we're really the Amber Girls. Get it straight.

Me & SalSal. We don't hang out much because when we do, someone pays for it. hahah


The group at Headhunters...


half the group at socals...


We ended up going to my house to play games. it's too hard when everyone's buzzed becuase everyone (except me) is lame. and my brother becuase he deon'st drink.

When Debby and her new (younger) man started making out, I knew the night was over. SO, I made it til 11ish and had a pretty good time.

I hung out with my ex yesterday. i love that fucker; but, what to do? We went to a flea market after a deliciuos pizza pie. that was kinda fun! i wanted him to stay all night but he never settles for long. he's like a hummingbird...gottamovegottamovegotta move....

geesh

nevermind winning the lottery...i think i'd die of boredom.

i was up at 4:45, cleaned the kitchen, made b'fast, organized my DVD's, made the bed, went grocery shopping, raked & mowed the lawn all before 10:00am.

just got off a lay-fest on the couch watching animal cops. some people are unbelievable. UNbelievable.

meanwhile, Kody...on the other hand...the POSTER child for ultimate spoiledness. he thinks i made the bed for him.

4 more days off...honestly, i'd rather stare at my OWN walls than my cubicle walls so i's ain't complainin.

A new look

Furlough Friday...gotta love 'em. i had to drive all the way out to roseville for this girl. and it was worth it.

BEFORE:

very Gray

AFTER:

with a cute little blue hair extension...and BANGS!!

This is us at the salon. Natalie so cute but that's not what's amazing. LOOK HOW SKINNY I LOOK! And the mirror adds 10 pounds the camera adds 10 pounds so i'm actaully anorexic!

Janet's Birthday

I had more fun planning her day than she had having it.


I went to the store at 6am to get her a bouquet of balloons. this was actaully an after-thought becuase i had already bought all her gifts, her cupcake, her decorations and it was very hard to keep mum but i did.


she had mentioned she'd like it if we'd change our Dexter night from Tuesday to Wednesday so she could feel like she was doing something on her birthday. so she must've thought that would be it. how sad. I put her balloons in my office becuase Kody was over-curious about them and how sad would it be if she came in to 6 popped and chewed up balloons. taht's worse than thinking Wednesday Dexter night is the happenin birthday.

I went home for lunch and decorated the living room, put out her presents and decorated a wine glass that would act as a table for her delicious caramel apple cupcake.

Isn't that sweet?


Anyway...funny story. i read a meditation book yesterday cover to cover and i'm ready to live my life calmly and kindly but i waited a full hour for that bitch to get to my house so i could surprise her! Too long of a story but i should have known better with Janet. She's a dawdeler (sp). I tried to be in the present and focus on my breathing and realize how horrible it was to be mad at someone that has no idea you're trying to surprise her. shows you how selfish i am. this was all about ME!


but i digress. did i capture the moment or WHAT?



Opening her gifts and talking lovingly to Betsy becuase she's gay like that. Even Betsy's embarrassed.



Janet likes to keep her eyes closed so she doesn't see her gift until it's fully unwrapped. that's kinda funny...She's 10.




This was my favorite present to her (becuase it's also to me) and i made her open it last:

(it's a mini cribbage board)



So here they all are. 1 outta 4 ain't bad.

Tidbit Blog

What a great weekend. REally...when you're not hammered, the whole world opens up.

Course when you're not hammered time can crawl to the point of standing still like last night. i was ready for bed at 5:15.

We took the dogs to the self doggy wash yesterday. Kody, Mr. Confident/Alpha/Prick dog cried the whole time. WHAT A BABY!!! Betsy was in the next bath over and not a peep! So i washed him in lavendar soap to match his behavior.

Before the wash, I needed to drop off some donation stuff and we THOUGTH we were at the spca thrift store, but we were at mid-town thrift store. Anyway, i bought the cutest lamp that i'm going to put over my sticky outty counter area that has NO light and it's where i do all my prep work! I am so thrilled! I'll pix it when it's done.

We had our last SPCA class on Saturday. I took a dog I was planning on fostering. Glad i did THAT! I think i'm the worst dog lover becuase i wanted to choke that fucker. It was a good manners class and neither the dog nor I had any. I was cracking myself up because when the instructor wasn't looking i was yelling at the dog under my breath calling him names. But that was how Kody was raised and look at him...

After class I went over to Debby's to FINALLY dye my brothers hair. i mean, he looks REALLY good with gray hair, some guys just do, but he also looks really good with less-than-gray hair.

We all really look alike. Especially as we age. fucking aging.

Nothing too special we just liked this pix....

I'm sure i said something funny becuase i'm so funny.

Ta daaaa! The NEW Keune Model!!!

I like it. its natural looking and it looks good.

I went to Janets after that and met one of my blog fans, KENDALL! ahahaha...i have fans. I loved her. I love you Kendall! And she had gorgeous red hair which i want. and i will get. As soon as we all go out she's coming with.

Saturday night I passed out candy. I bought FOUR bags of candy and got 5 small gruops of trick or treaters. life can be so cruel...i had to look at THIS for 2 days:

So, DB must be happy becuase the fucking yankee's won again. pisser....